The Last Time
by love.x.music
Summary: InuYasha must give up all he has come to cherish.
1. The Last Time

Disclaimer: I don't own InuYasha. That goes to Rumiko Takahashi. Smart Lady. Smart, smart lady.

*~*~*~*

_If I had no more time  
No more time left to be here Would you cherish what we had?   
Was it everything that you were looking for?_

It was happening. It was really happening. And there wasn't anything I could do to stop it. Not now—not this time, this time; it was beyond me.

Who could have known that in the end I'd have to go to hell anyways? Who could have imagined? More importantly, who could have told her—my koishii, my beloved Kagome, that all she would fight for would be in vain? Who…?

I'm confused. I'm so _fucking_ confused. I don't want to leave. _That_ I know. I've come to realize that I never loved Kikyou, and I have a feeling that she never truly loved me either. I now know that what I felt was loneliness—the need for companionship, to want to know that you aren't going to die alone. Now I know I won't.

There isn't anything I wouldn't do for Kagome. She is everything to me. I know this now. I wish I'd known sooner. Two days ago, Midoriko appeared to us, not long after we defeated Naraku, and told us that if we truly wished for the jewel to disappear from this earth, then we would need to sacrifice something in its name to offset the battle that raged within it. She told us that we needed something to cancel out the violence—an example of peace between youkai and ningen. We thought long and hard before Kagome timidly gave her answer. It was uttered so softly, barely a whisper, that even with my advanced hearing, it was difficult to hear. It was one word, who could have known it held my future?

"_Hanyou."_

I've never seen Kagome look like that. My beautiful Kagome, she looked so, _sad_. Of course just saying sad is an understatement, but I do not have words to describe the look on her face. I remember how my breath seemed to stop as Sango asked her to clarify. My Kagome explained, bless her, she's such a smart girl.

"_Hanyou. A single being containing a peaceful mix of youkai and ningen. Just as cold neutralizes hot, the ningen neutralizes the youkai, creating one warmth."_

Her voice was still a whisper, and as comprehension dawned on the others' faces, I waited for the dreaded question to be asked.

"_Can it be any hanyou?"_

I snorted. Come on Miroku, aren't you supposed to be the embodiment of wisdom? Midoriko's answer came in the form of a head shake in the negative.

"_He must be strong, and courageous. He must know both his ningen and youkai sides well."_

She turned to me then, and I knew, I just _knew_. I'm sure there was more terror on my face then, than I'd ever cared to show in my life.

"_InuYasha."_ She said, her soft voice heavy with the burden of the words yet to be spoken.

"_It is up to ye, hanyou, for the jewel calls to you to destroy it." _

I remember Kagome sinking to the ground in a fit of sobs, and though everyone wanted to—nobody moved to comfort her.

"_Two moons, InuYasha, I give ye two moons time to do what ye must. We will meet again at sunset before the third moon."_

And then she was gone.

*~*~*~*

I'd gone immediately to Goshinboku, it was always my source of calm. The others were comforting each other. I knew I was going to be taken from the most important people in my life—and Kagome. We'd all gone to sleep, hoping to wake up the next morning to discover this was all some terrible nightmare.

Of course it was no such thing. Now I had one full day left, I was to leave this world at sunset the next day. We spent the day talking, the houshi and the taijiya, and even the runt told me how glad they were to have had my friendship—even going so far as to claim me as family. And though I tried to stop them, my tears betrayed me and I cried. We all cried.

Day turned to night, and I sat staring at the last full moon I'd see. I could hear her approaching. Smell her soothing scent, even before I could see her. Instead of speaking to me like I'd assumed she'd come to do, instead she simply sat by my side. We sat like that, side by side, staring at the sky for the longest time. Then she spoke. And when she did—I wished she hadn't.

"_I love you, you know." _She'd said. Her voice was barely there again. She'd cried the most today.

"_I know." _I replied—because it was true, no matter how much it hurt me to say. Then she surprised me for the second time that night. She reached up, and had gently tugged my face towards hers. Her eyes shone with unshed tears, the moonlight made them glow and they slowly drifted shut as she brought her lips to mine. I made no move to stop her.

_If I couldn't feel your touch   
And no longer were you with me   
I'd be wishing you were here  
To be everything that I'd be looking for  
I don't wanna forget the present is a gift  
And I don't wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me  
'Cause Lord only knows another day is not really guaranteed_.

She continued to kiss me, her lips were soft, but insistent and I couldn't stop myself from reciprocating. My arms wrapped around her and I pulled her into my lap, holding her close as I kissed her back. I put all my unsaid words, my hidden feelings, my pent up emotions, all of my _love_ into that kiss and I _know_ she felt it. My hands threaded through her hair, and she ran her hands up and down my back in an effort to quell some of my fears and offer me some comfort.

_So every time you hold me  
Hold me like this is the last time  
Every time you kiss me  
Kiss me like you'll never see me again   
Every time you touch me   
Touch me like this is the last time  
Promise that you'll love me  
Love me like you'll never see me again_.

Her next words were just as soft spoken as the others, but they shocked me the most.

"_Please, InuYasha—make love to me"_

I froze. There were so many things. Gods, _so many_ things that I wanted to do in that moment, but all I could bring myself to do was kiss her with all my heart and soul, and hope that she'd get the message. She got it loud and clear. Of course she did. She's my Kagome. Our kisses became more passionate, and though I knew this would only complicate things, I couldn't help but want to indulge myself in this long awaited fantasy.

_How many really know what love is?   
Millions never will   
Do you know until you lose it   
That it's everything that we are looking for _

I stripped off my red haori and spread it on the ground behind her in an attempt to make the grass and dirt more comfortable. She gave me a shy smile as I lowered her to the ground, losing myself in a sea of striking cobalt. Those cobalt eyes—ever expressive, were overflowing with love. And it was all for me. I gave her a small smile in return.

Was this what it felt like to feel loved? I wondered vaguely as her lips returned to mine, and my hand crept up to fondle a breast. Soon enough, I crave skin to skin contact and I make a clean cut down her blouse and toss it away somewhere. She sits up and removes her breast binding contraption before shyly reaching to undo the ties to my juban, before pushing it off my shoulders and placing it next to us. I take a moment to admire her beauty, before trailing kissed down her jaw, to her neck before suckling on a dusky nipple. I watch her silently as I continue to tease her breasts—her head is thrown back, her mouth open in wordless pleasure, and her raven hair is spread about us wildly.

_I don't wanna forget the present is a gift  
And I don't wanna take for granted the time you may have here with me   
'Cause Lord only knows another day is not really guaranteed._

I was questioning my sanity by the time I reached her womanhood, which was already slick with her juices, and the scent of her arousal was like fuel to my fire. I gave a tentative lick and before I knew it I was feasting like I hadn't eaten in days. Her mewls and moans only spurred me on and it all culminated when she finally fell, her orgasm washed over her and I watched her face intently, amazed at the expression of absolute euphoria that was present there.

I don't remember stripping out of my hakama and fundoshi, only that I was hard, ready, and in between her legs before she had come down from her high. When her eyes finally focused, I knew she could feel me pressing against her sex, and I waited for her to give me some sort of sign to continue, giving her one last chance to back out. She smiled and nodded, and with a quick snap of my hips I was buried within her. She cried out at the sudden intrusion, I had felt her maidenhead break and I knew she had to have felt some sort of pain, so I focused my attention on her breasts to give her time to adjust to the feeling.

I knew she was ready when she thrust her hips gently against mine, and I reciprocated the action, drawing myself out of her as far as possible before sliding back in. We both groaned, and soon enough I was pounding into her as she groaned and gasped erotic versions of my name into one of my ears, and I was growling and grunting at the feeling of being inside her. Her blunt human nails scratched unknown paths down my back and her legs wrapped around my hips in an attempt to bring her closer to her previously experienced euphoria. I sped up my thrusts, giving it to her harder and faster until she cried out from the pleasure, her body convulsing around mine, squeezing my cock as her orgasm overtook her.

I gave a couple more thrusts before I joined her. My cock throbbed in release and I saw white—blinded by the intensity of my own release. When I opened my eyes again, she was looking up at me smiling softly. I gave her a small smile of my own before I rolled to the side, bringing her to lie on my chest, her head buried in between my chin and my shoulder. I finally felt at peace. I just wished it would last.

_Promise that you'll love me   
Love me like you'll never see me again_.

"_Kagome?"_ I questioned. She grunted a little in response.

"_I love you too you know."_ I felt her smile against me, as she replied.

"_I know."_

*~*~*~*

I'd woken the next morning with Kagome in my arms, and we'd made love once more before returning to camp. I couldn't help but feel despair over our situation. We'd finally found each other, and now we were going to lose each other. The rest of my day was spent attempting to meditate to clear my mind and make my journey easier. I went to Kagome's time, and said my goodbyes. They were almost like my own family, and it saddened me that I was leaving them. I couldn't help but feel like I'd let them down.

It was nearing sunset. Kagome had informed the others of her decision to leave after I was gone. They were upset, but they knew—she couldn't stay here without me. Besides, who knows if after the jewel is gone, she'd be allowed to stay in this time?

A familiar being appeared and I hugged Kagome close to me, trying to prevent the inevitable.

"_InuYasha the hanyou"_ She said. _"It is time."_

I looked pathetic. I know I did. I couldn't stop the tears as the made tracks down my face, my ears drooped and my shoulders were slumped. I gave each of my friends a hug, telling them each what they meant to me, Sango—the sister I never had, Miroku—a better brother than the one I actually had, Shippou—my adopted son, and finally Kagome—my mate, my love, my _everything._ I gave her a kiss filled with everything I was feeling, desperation, anger, grief, _love._ It was all there. Then I turned to the ethereal looking being that stood encased in light, some four feet above us. She held out her hand to me, and with one last longing look at the people that meant the most to me in the world, I placed my hand in hers.

Then they were gone. Everything was gone. Gone was the life I'd once called my own, my life was different now, spent devoted to the Shikon no Tama. Fate is cruel, I'd decided. But there was nothing I could do about it now. I still can't help but think…

…If only we'd known…


	2. Remember Me

Disclaimer: Don't own, don't own, don't own. ... Dammit.

*~*~*~*

Kagome sighed as she heaved the bundle of wood into her carrying sack and began her trek back towards Kaede's hut. _'Soon'_ she mused, _'I won't be able to do this anymore...'_ She gave a slight smile and rubbed her still flat abdomen. The wind caressed her gently, bringing with it the whispered song of her beloved.

_Remember, I will still be here_

_As long as you hold me, in your memory_

It wasn't long after InuYasha had gone that she'd found out she was pregnant, and even sooner after that when she'd realized her love had not gone at all. He was in the air she breathed, the water she bathed in, and in every leaf and tree branch she looked at.

_Remember, when your dreams have ended_

_Time can be transcended_

_Just remember me_

She missed him, there was no doubt about it, and as she walked back towards Kaede's hut each step held years worth of memory. She'd probably 'sat' him in every spot along the well worn path and although it had been a petty argument at the time, it was now a fond memory. The setting sun glinted through the trees, reflecting the exact shade of _his_ eyes. Her eyes burned from the tears she refused to shed as she placed her firewood by the door of the hut and walked in.

_I am the one star that keeps burning, so brightly,_

_It is the last light, to fade into the rising sun_

_I'm with you_

_Whenever you tell, my story_

_For I am all I've done_

She gave Kaede a small smile and sat, staring blankly outside at the stars above. The elder woman's eyes betrayed her worry, but she said nothing. Kagome, was busy mentally telling her unborn child how brave and beautiful its father was. InuYasha was and always would be her mate, her husband, for as long as she lived. She had vowed, the moment she found out about her pregnancy, that she would remain in the feudal era and raise their child. A testament of the love they had for each other.

_Remember, I will still be here_

_As long as you hold me, in your memory_

_Remember me_

The others hadn't been shocked to learn of her pregnancy, they were however, extremely concerned of her condition. Sango, of her physical health, and Miroku of her mental health. She assured them that this child would not hinder her recovery, but that it was more likely to help. Now, she would always have a piece of InuYasha with her, to reassure her that it had not been a dream, _or_ a nightmare. He was real. Their _love_ was real.

_As long as I still can reach out, and touch you_

_Then I will never die_

_Remember, I'll never leave you_

_If you will only_

_Remember me_

_Remember me..._

She had left the hut in favour of sitting outside of the door and gazing up at the stars. The wind blew around her but she felt none of its chill. She could still feel his touch, feel his arms wrapped around her in the cold night air. She could still hear his voice on the wind, it spoke of his love, and their unborn child. And when she looked upon the Goshinboku, she could almost see him there... his red firerat clothing high in the branches of the tree.

_Remember, I will still be here_

_As long as you hold me_

_In your memory_

_Remember, when your dreams have ended_

_Time can be transcended_

_I live forever_

_Remember me_

She closed her eyes and said a prayer that they could be together somehow, someday soon. That her love could somehow return to her and that they would raise their child together, as a family. But even if that never happened, she hoped that he would be proud of her, and lend her strength to raise their child. The wind carried a whisper to her, and she sighed simply wishing for the one she loved to come back to her...

_Remember me_

_Remember... me..._

_A/N: _This is my first time on and as such I have no idea what I'm doing. =) But I'm slowly starting to figure it out. Anyway. I'd just like to give credit to the song used in the previous chapter; Like You'll Never See Me Again - Alicia Keys, and the song in this chapter; Remember Me - Josh Groban. If you'd like me to post links for the songs, let me know.  
Last but not least: REVIEW! Let me know how I'm doing. :)


	3. Savin' Me

Disclaimer: I do not own InuYasha. He does however, own me. Bow Chika Wow Wow. ;)

A/N: Song for this chapter: Saving Me- Nickelback. One more chapter!

***********

In all of his unnaturally long life, he wasn't sure he'd ever felt anything like it. Being ripped from his friends-no-_family_, and the love of his life was almost more than he could handle. InuYasha had never known madness, but he was sure this was it.

_Prison gates won't open up for me_

_On these hands and knees I'm crawlin'_

_Oh, I reach for you_

Endless days turned into unrelenting nights as he watched those he had come to cherish go about their lives. Sango and Miroku had finally gotten married and started on their family, but more than anything he'd never felt as conflicted as when they'd all realized Kagome was pregnant. A father. He would have been a father. He'd howled at the irony of it, fruitless as it was. Where he existed was a different plane, there was nobody to hear him, to keep him company. InuYasha wasn't sure what hell was, but this came pretty damn close.

_Well I'm terrified of these four walls_

_These iron bars can't hold my soul in_

_All I need is you_

_Come please I'm callin'_

_And oh I scream for you_

_Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin'_

There wasn't a moment that didn't go by where he wished that things could have gone differently. There was so much more that he would have done, so much more that he would have said, so much more that he _wouldn't_ have said had he known that this was the fate that he was to meet, maybe he'd have less regrets. Ah well. They always did say that hindsight was much clearer. InuYasha understood that quite clearly now.

_Heaven's gates won't open up for me_

_With these broken wings I'm fallin'_

_And all I see is you_

InuYasha was a fighter. He'd been a fighter all his life. In truth, it was one of the few things he _knew_ without a shred of doubt he could do. And though he hadn't become a fighter by choice, he felt it suited him. _So why didn't he feel like fighting now?_ He was confused, scared and exhausted. But he couldn't bring himself to do it anymore. He was tired of yelling and getting no response. He'd tried everything he could think of, he'd even prayed for Kami's sake! But yet he was still stuck here. Watching as the world he was ripped from continued without him. Kagome was starting to show now and he wanted nothing more than to lay his head on her slightly swollen belly and simply enjoy the sound of his child growing within. But he couldn't, and though the tears stung his eyes, he refused to allow them to fall. He'd cried too much. He'd learned that crying didn't solve anything a long time ago during his childhood, and now as an adult, he'd been given a chance to learn it again. He'd made himself promise, he would shed no more tears.

_And oh, I scream for you_

_Hurry I'm fallin', I'm fallin', I'm fallin'_

Trapped within his empty space he imagined that Kagome could feel his touch when he caressed her form. He imagined that she could hear his voice when he spoke to her, as if he were the wind. He could feel madness creeping up on him, like vines on a wall until he knew it would consume him whole. But through the darkness of his despair, fate once again shed light on the sorrow of his soul.

_Hurry I'm fallin'_

With a sudden flash of blinding light, the ancient warrior-priestess Midoriko appeared to InuYasha once more:

'_InuYasha the hanyou, how do you fare?' _

'_Keh.' _

'_I have been sent to convey my sincerest apologies' she started 'for we believe that we have been mistaken. To take you away from all those you cherished for our own desire was wrong. The sorrow that grows in your soul is of great danger to the jewel to which you are currently tied. And so, we have come to a much different path; you may return to your family. But one you return the jewel must be wished out of existence.' _

'_If that was the solution, then why couldn't we have just done that in the first place?' _

He questioned, thoroughly shocked by this turn of events.

'_To do so before would have been selfish, a wish born of selfish desires. Now however, the situation is different, it must be wished away before the sorrow that you hold in your soul taints it. The wish is selfless, and for greater humanity.' _

InuYasha just nodded. And with another flash of light, he could feel the forest floor, dirt and leaves and grass beneath his feet. He could smell the fresh, spring air, laden with the fragrance of sakura.

'_Kagome'_ he thought.

And so he set forth, running faster than he ever thought he could, towards where he knew Kagome would be at this time of day. With great leaps and bounds he travelled towards where he knew his thirst would be quenched, the longing and unrest he felt would be vanquished; where he would fight for those he loved to protect them from harm. InuYasha had never had a home, but he was sure that as long as he was with Kagome, he could create the grandest home anyone had ever seen.

_Show me what it's like_

_To be the last one standing_

_And teach me wrong from right_

_And I'll show you what I can be_

_Say it for me_

_Say it to me_

_And I'll leave this life behind me_

_Say it if it's worth saving me_

Finally, at long last Kaede's hut came into view, and when he walked in, it was just as it always was. He'd answered their questions in his gruff manner, and when it was time he'd taken Kagome aside, and shared with her his newfound knowledge of friendship, of life, and of _love._

***********

Review! Review! Review! ... Please?


	4. Heaven On Earth The Epilogue

Disclaimer: I don't own InuYasha. If I did, life would be a hell of a lot different.

A/N: Various songs used for this chapter: The River Flows Into You - Yiruma; Moonlight Sonata - Beethoven; Aufschwug - Schumann.

**********

Epilogue. - Heaven on Earth

Kagome couldn't explain it, but somehow, today felt different. There was an inexplicable energy in the air that hummed and buzzed around her. Spring had come early this year. The trees and wildlife had celebrated with a flourish of colour and sound that seemed to appear overnight.

She sighed, _'It's winter in my mind.'_ she thought sadly, as she absently rubbed her swollen abdomen.

Not a day went by where she didn't think of InuYasha. Where was he? Did he think of her as well? Was he safe? Would she _ever_ see him again? She'd learned to deter herself from that line of thinking, it only served to depress her further, and deep down, she knew she was going to hurt her unborn child if she didn't stop.

'_I hope it has InuYasha's ears.'_ she thought wistfully.

She, Sango, Miroku and Shippo had been sitting in Kaede's hut, waiting as Kaede prepared them lunch. The woman she had come to see as a grandmother of sorts was determined to make sure that she got as many nutrients into her as physically possible, and had been feeding her what seemed like every two hours. Needless to say, she was feeling pretty stuffed.

As normal as the day started out, nothing could have been more unexpected, but more desired than when InuYasha stepped into the hut. Well, what she assumed was InuYasha. He certainly looked like her late husband, even smelled like him, but in the Feudal era, she had learned that much was possible, and they weren't about to take any risks. Sango and Miroku, ever vigilant as her makeshift siblings had immediately shifted to protect her, questioning 'InuYasha' with such precision and detail-- it made her head spin.

In the end, InuYasha had gotten the chance to explain his story; that his sorrow was tainting the jewel, and that it had been wished out of existence as an act of good for others.

Then the shock began to set in. Kagome was still sitting in her corner, still as a statue, one hand held protectively over her abdomen, the other covering her mouth-open and betraying her shock. It was the absolute hurt in her husband's eyes that made her snap out of it. And then she was up, running, and launching herself at him. He caught her, taking great care to be gentle, and not to crush her to him like she knew he wanted to.

They decided a walk was in order. InuYasha proceeded to do all he had desired during his time away; laying a fuzzy ear against her swollen stomach, stealing kisses from her every now and then, just breathing in her scent, which he'd claimed was precious, especially now that she was 'pupped' as he'd called it. The combination of their scents was more than appealing to him.

With all the formalities out of the way, the newly reunited couple found their thoughts turning to _other_, more _physical_ needs that had begun to make themselves known. After a good ten minutes of reassuring her husband _'No, you won't hurt the child InuYasha--it's fine!'_ and the extraction of several promises _'Yes, I'll tell you to stop if I think you're hurting it.' 'Yes, I'll be fine.' 'Yes, I'd tell you if I didn't want to do this!'_ Kagome and InuYasha made their way back to their clearing.

Amidst the touches, the caresses, the tastes and the scents a love that had conquered death itself was rekindled. Feelings were explored, thoughts were made into actions and two beings were completed.

As she lay in the shelter in the Goshinboku tree, wrapped in her husbands' arms, Kagome smiled.

'_Spring has come.'_ she thought happily.

And so it had.

~ The. End.

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So... that's it. The end. Short but sweet. And HAPPY! I'm a sucker for happy endings, but I love me some angst too. Leave me a review! ;)


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